A grandmother is a mother who has a second chance

Friday, October 12, 2007

Don't Blink

There’s another fairly new song on my country station called “Don’t Blink.” It’s about how fast time goes by and trying to enjoy every moment. One of the lines is, “Don’t blink, just like that you’re six years old and you take a nap. Then you wake up and you’re 25…..” I was talking about this to my son, Joe, the other day. I noted that “back in the day” when the year changed, it would take me much of January to get used to writing the new year on checks, typing on letters, etc. Now that is never a problem! The years fly by so quickly that I never get used to any four digits long enough for it to be a difficult transition.

Joe said he figures that when you’re 10, a year is one-tenth of your life so it seems like a long time. But as you grow older, that changes and he (at the ripe old age of 34) already notices a difference. I said, “Yeah, imaging how it is at 61!!”. He replied, “At your age, a year must feel like about as long as taking a shower.” Did I mention that the kid’s a real smartass?

So I spent some time mulling this over (I like to mull) and thought of times and dates that have been the most significant in my life and have led me to the place I’m in today.

July, 1946 – I was born (Hey, that’s pretty significant)

September, 1958 – I met Ricky Nelson while he was filming Rio Bravo in Tucson. My mom was an extra in the movie and one day she brought me to the lot with her.. OHMIGOD can I even tell you how much in love with him I was. There I was, 12 years old, acne, buck teeth, totally geeky. But I was so sure he’d wait for me. I have a picture of us somewhere and I’ll post it if I can ever find it.

October, 1964 – my brother, Tony, was born. I was 18 and a freshman in college and it was one of the most exciting events of my life. I hovered over him for many years (still do sometimes) and thoroughly enjoyed watching him grow up. He’s always been a close friend.

September, 1973 – my twins were born. I had a great pregnancy until the last couple of weeks, then a very rough emergency C-section and a 16-day hospital stay. But, oh the joy of those two babies. Yes, there were days when their father would come home and find all three of us crying! But I’d go back to the days when they were young in a heartbeat if I could.

May, 1982 – divorced my first husband. And found myself! For the first time in my life I felt independent and strong. And I so loved being a single mom. The kids and I had some wonderful bonding moments during the next few years.

February, 1987 – married husband #2 (BIG MISTAKE) and moved to California. The whole first year here I mostly cried. Bad marriage, moved away from my family. But it all passed eventually and now we’ve been here over 20 years. Don’t know if it will ever feel like home, but it’s where I am and probably where I’ll stay since my kids both still live here.

March 1996 – Divorced #2 (pun intended). What a friggin’ relief that was! Spent the next few years having more fun and seeing more of the Bay Area than I had in the previous 10 years. It was truly a fun time.

October, 1999 – met Ed through Match.com and realized I finally found someone with the same values as mine and whose family was as important to him as mine is to me.

December, 2005 – my daughter returned from Russia with her kids, my new grandchildren. I always looked forward to being a grandmother and knew I’d love them. What I didn’t expect is the totally engulfing emotions and love – very different than what you feel for your own children, but equally as strong and all-consuming.

January, 2008 – This date hasn’t arrived yet, but it’s the next big milestone – retirement. Then Phase 3 of my life can get into high gear!

And I’m definitely cutting down on my blinking……


Autumn said...

I love that song. I used it for a slide show post of my self growing up several weeks back on my blog. It is amazing how fast time flys. I remember my mom telling me when I was young that the older you got the faster time went. I use to phoo phoo her but you know now that I am in my 50's I believe she is right. I don't know when it happened, but somewehre along the way I BLINKED!

icanseeclearlynow said...

hi there. i love that you took the time to reflect on your life and record your milestones. in '82 you divorced and FOUND YOURSELF. isn't it always the case that our authentic self is buried (or in hiding) when we are with the WRONG person.

i'm glad that you found yourself, making it possible to share your wisdom with others. thanks!



Scoobers said...

I read your post and went for a drive tonight. I had never heard the song before but it came on the radio... Kenny Chesney, I think? Anyway,
so true. It's scary how fast time flies.

I need to cut down on my blinking early... as well as chili cheese dogs.

Although, the latter might be the more difficult of the two.